glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
