Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
