so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
