Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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