Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize