She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
