are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I faked an abortion last night.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
