If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
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