That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
