I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
