There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
