its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
only if we run a train.
done.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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