I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Randomize
