There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
