he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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