I need help removing her.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
