no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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