i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
