All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Randomize
