YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
