i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Randomize
