Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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