Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Randomize
