i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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