Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
