do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
