are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
