yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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