i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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