Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
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