i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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