i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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