K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize