I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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