Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
