Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize
