Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
