R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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