can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
