K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Randomize
