Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Randomize
