Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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