I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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