it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
