i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
