but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
