Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
