The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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