She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
