Dual....:-)
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize