So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize